EXPLANATION: While the post was supposed to be not-quite-serious and written with the tongue-in-a-cheek approach, some people took it pretty seriously. Still, some interesting discussion arose from it, so we thought it’s good to keep the post, but with the declaration of the original intention.
People often discuss which miniatures they like the most, which releases were the coolest, and what they would like to paint. Now we had a totally different idea!
Throughout the years many ugly miniatures have been made. Not only ugly, but also badly sculpted, or based on bad or ridiculous concepts. It’s time to find them, collect them and to find the worst one of all! 😀
When we started the discussion at our forum, it seemed obvious that everybody’s first candidate was Nagash. Some must have even wondered if there can be anything to beat this ugly model. But we have good news for you! We collected 25 miniatures which will compete for the title of the worst miniature ever made! And believe me – Nagash cannot be so sure of keeping his title!
We created a little poll for you to vote. Please review our candidates, and choose your favorites. The winner of this round will compete with a few next winners for the title of the ultimate Worst Miniature Ever Made!
Candidate #1: Nagash [Games Workshop]
This used to be unrivalled favorite in the ‘worst miniatures’ category before some other candidates were found.
Taking a quick look at the original artwork and comparing it to the sculpt reveals all the horrbile truths about this model. What was supposed to be the most sinister lord of the undead, became a poorly sculpted clown. Unfortunately there are many others, who try hard to earn the title of the worst miniature ever made!
Candidate #2: Sunbathing Orc [Metal Magic]
If you don’t have a strong mind, better don’t check a full-sized photo of this miniature. It’s a challenge to your sanity! You will see an orc with all the anatomical details, and it’s not a pretty sight. Well, you’ve been warned… It’s great that sculpting quality isn’t too good on this one. 😉
Candidate #3: Ariel [Games Workshop]
Some people claim the model is not bad at all. But some can’t accept this huge butterfly lady as the queen of wood elves. Although Games Workshop’s sculptors often proved they see female beauty in their own special way, this is one of the times they outdid themselves! Just look at Ariel, the Queen of Athel Loren and behold the fullness of her beauty!
Candidate #4: Wet Nurse [Kingdom Death]
OK, this is a strong candidate. Maybe not bad as far as sculpting skills go, but the concept is controversial at least. Some say it’s offensive with all the private parts exposed here and there, some say it’s only ridiculous. If you want to see a penis-nosed snail in a shoe, check this miniature out. You will get a raping tail and lots of arms and boobs as a bonus 😉
Candidate #5: Infant Sunstalker [Kingdom Death]
Kingdom Death again! This time with a vomiting toad of many arms. Need to say more about how silly this concept is? Or is the photo enough for you?
Candidate #6: Mezoghoul/Ezoghoul [probably Target Games]
It wouldn’t be all that bad if it was a small miniature, but this beast is not small. Call it a classic if you want, but it’s difficult to defend such a sculpt. Here it goes – for your viewing pleasure 🙂
UPDATE: As we learned from the comments left by our readers, the model was labeled “Mezoghoul” by mistake. Probably the author didn’t want to give it a second look, which would be necessary to correct the typo. 😉
Candidate #7: Musician [Rackham]
Although Rackham was famous for their great sculpts (and poor business decisions), they had several memorable pitfalls, too. This musician os one of them. General concept and composition make it one of their classics for sure.
Candidate #8: Archaon on foot [Games Workshop]
Now we’re back to Games Workshop’s models. Although some people stand in defense of this model, we will not try to ruin its chances of claiming the title! While the mounted version of Archaon became a classic (especially for its monumental pose and excellent steed), this one is just an opposite. It looks like a quick and poor conversion of the mounted version. The legs look a bit awkward and the general proportions don’t help – huge and massive legs plus a tiny head are a killer combo!
Candidate #9: Great Space Ape [TinMan Miniatures]
Unless you’re much into retro sci-fi, you may find this concept disturbing or at least weird. Maybe it will be enough to make it a winner for you?
Candidate #10: Mind Eater [Reaper]
Reaper Miniatures presented many surprising sculpts in their catalogue. This one became a candidate for the title of the worst miniature ever made. Isn’t it cute in its way? So what is it? A brain on insect legs with leaf-shaped claws? If it isn’t enough for you, take a look at the amazing sculpting quality and behold the mind eater!
Candidate #11: Dark Elf Witch Elf [Games Workshop]
Games Workshop must have mastered the art of making excellent female models! Here they are again with dark elf witch elves. Fantastic and well sculpted haircuts and beautiful faces are what these models… surely don’t have. And anybody who thinks weapons should be at least usable will be surprised with the funny objects they carry…
Candidate #12: Barbarian [Assassin Miniaturen]
If you’ve never been to a body building contest, you will reconsider any chance of seeing one after taking a closer look at this barbarian. His muscles must be the example of beautifully built masculine beauty. The question is only: Is he human, or some other species? No human I’ve ever seen looked like this. But maybe barbarians have different muscles than us, modern humans?
Candidate #13: Tiki the Wood Golem [Reaper]
Now, focus for a few seconds: It’s not a toy, it’s not a cheap toy. It’s a miniature from Reaper. Just take a look at those wonderful proportions, great texture of wood and excellent facial expression. Add to this its great body shape, stance and you have another candidate for our title!
Candidate #14: Minotaurs [Games Workshop]
If you know what smoked ham looks like, you don’t have to look at those minotaurs. Or maybe take a minotaur and put it on your sandwich instead of ham? The official paintjob didn’t help those guys, but if you take a look at the way their muscles are sculpted, you will be amazed how creative the sculptor good. Or maybe they live on the same planet as candidate #12?
Candidate #15: Dimitri [Taban Miniatures/Eden – rejected]
Taban Miniatures and their Eden line of miniatures are most likely known for nice miniatures in post-apocalyptic theme. They ooze character, and generally look cool. But sometimes you want to ooze too much and look too cool. That’s what you get for trying too hard:
UPDATE: Thanks to information from Mohand we know that the sculpt was rejected and wasn’t released. Good decision, guys. But we can’t allow this little gem to be unknown by people 😉
Candidate #16: Etoile Mortant [HeartBreaker/Target Games]
We can’t recall the name of this model, but it’s a good miniature from the Warzone game. The face is another interesting approach to sculpting female faces, but this time the sculptor was pretty successful… at making her look like Whoopi Goldberg. Is this enough to make it a good miniature? Don’t think so…
If you can tell us the name of the model, it will be very helpful!
UPDATE: Thanks to Thomas Schadle we know the name of this model now.
Candidate #17: Imperial Rams Air Cavalry [Target Games/Heartbreaker]
Fortunately this time Warzone gave us another chance to show something remarkable! Take a look at this soldier and compare it to the original artwork. Don’t you see real combat stress and exhaustion on his face. Boy, it’s a real war face! Or should he be given a latrine instead of the rocket? 😀
Candidate #18: Dusk Realm Demon [Target Games/Heartbreaker]
Are we done with Warzone? Are we done with Target Games and Heartbreaker yet? No! Without this dusk realm demon this list wouldn’t be complete! And to give you some explanation of how horrifying this thing is, let me quote this description:
…the Dusk Realm Demon is a brute in every sense of the word. It exists only to kill and maim and while it is given to fits of blinding rage, it commands a keen intellect. These Demons seem at home in the utter dark of the Under Realms and the sweltering twilight of the deep jungles. So hideous is the presence of a Dusk Realm Demon that it causes abject fear in all who encounter it and like its smaller cousin, is capable of devastating attacks with its horned head. A charging Dusk Realm Demon has been known to be able to withstand the charge of a Bull Myrmadon…..
Candidate #19: Stygian Venom Spawn [Target Games/Heartbreaker]
Shouldn’t this miniature be called “Stygian venom spider spawn” – it will remain a mystery. But even without the mystery you can see that it’s a really uncommon sculpt. A model which will have its place in the history of miniature painting hobby.
Candidate #20: Bad Girls [Fenryll]
Fenryll must be one of the masters of creating mediocre sculpts and presenting them with mediocre paintjobs. But sometimes they do something that really shines. Something that will change your concepts of ugly and nice. Just see what their bad girls look like. Most likely they won’t need any further comments…
Candidate #21: Kaos Monster [Acheson Creations]
Why would one sculpt such a thing? Why would one buy such a thing?
And no, it’s not a small mini. Can’t justify it with size. It’s big and it’s memorable. It’s even unforgettable. Solid candidate to the throne!
Candidate #22: Wild Dunger [Ramshackle Games]
This one will be haunting you in your dreams. And prepare for some worse news: There are more of them. And a huge version of a dunger, with lots of crew on platforms, nicknamed a “fork lift with idiots on top”. Are you brave enough to see it, follow the link to the thread on our forum. Yes, you need to see all the pages! 🙂
Candidate #23: Wight Lord [Heresy Miniatures]
Mr. I-believe-I-can-fly, or maybe a gymnast? Or maybe he’s dancing zbójnicki – a Polish regional dance? Aside from the pose, sculpting quality alone would be enough to impress us! Just take a look at the armor he’s wearing. It’s some plate armor and… no, it can’t be chainmail. Chainmail doesn’t look like a cloth with holes. Or does it?
Candidate #24: Drakon Riders [Mantic Games]
If Mantic Games were supposed to release a wargame with 10mm miniatures, these would be decent dragon riders for the scale. Unfortunately they’re not 10mm and they’re not cool. Enjoy or watch out..
Candidate #25: Lurking Danger [Assassin Miniaturen]
Nameless already described this model so well, that adding anything would be ruining this description which already reveals all the assets of this model! But read it by yourselves:
Please note the pretty face, cool anatomy, street lamp with height suitable for a dwarven city and clever use of that lamp to create the flight effect… guys, stop it, she IS FLYING…
I’ve just noticed two… spherical objects (no, I will NOT use word “balls” here) in a very unfortunate place, right under her left palm…
Vote for your favorites
This poll will run for a month, which means it will be open until the end of November. Until then you can vote for your favorite three miniatures from the list. This will allow us to find out which miniatures are the worst of them all. So…
UPDATE: We removed the poll, because it is closed now. The results were posted in a separate announcement.
That’s (not) all, folks!
The subject is so wide and there are so many gems to be found, that we decided to allow more candidates to be entered. When we have 50 candidates, we will allow to vote on the next 25 (candidates #26-50). And after a few such polls, we will make grand finals, to find out the ultimate winner of the title of the Worst Miniature Ever Made.
If you would like to add your own candidates to the list, feel free to add them in comments here, in the respective thread on our forum, or respond to one of the Worst Miniature announcements on our facebook page. Thanks a lot!
And in the meantime, please vote for your favorite candidates. Support the worst miniature of your choice! 😀
PS – most photos were found on the internet and used without permission of their respective authors. If you are one of them and want your photo removed – let us know and we will remove it at your request.