This is a nice commission piece, the base is awesome and very well detailed but doesn't distract from the minis on it.
The first thing which really caught me was the really bright blue cloaks, they caught my eye and although really done well, my focus keeps moving to the cloaks rather than the main guy for example. I think perhaps because of the brightness of the cloak and more realistic effect of the rest of the model it's very distracting. I personally would feel that the face or at least upper torso should have been the focus of the model, but this is doesn't feel that way. The sword is also really well done but as it's a lot more subdued compared with the cloak i still get drawn away. Still focusing on the inquisitor, i'm not keen on the eyes of the model. They look as if he's high on something and completely spaced out. No freehand on the cloak?
it's such a large canvas for a painter
The rest of the models they work very well actually, and their other parts on the models are done well, i particularly like the servitor with some skin and staff. His white and blue clothing really work well with the metallics, it's very crisp and clean.
The book itself as you've tried to follow the client's wishes is a very nicely weathered piece of paper and the book itself is well done, but i feel that the freehand writing on it could have been improved a bit more with a fancy font style. Also the lines across it could have been varied a bit more with more breaks in between, i think it would have improved it.
Now all that being said and done, i think it's a really nicely painted piece but it's not quite how i'd approach this one as the balance of focus and colour is a bit lost on the main guy.
in cases like these if the client is happy it's all good 
